maanantai 14. maaliskuuta 2016

Dark and Hollow

Sometimes I really wish I had this ability to put the things that trouble me inside a box. Then I would move the box aside when it's not a time to clean it up. And then again when it is a right time I would open the box and gradually go through all the worries.
Well. It's not reality. I am not able to do that. Reasons why; are most so personal I'm not gonna tell you about them. The only thing you can know is that what it is, is so major for my mental and physical health that doing things I would normally enjoy (like makeup- and hairstyles, writing, playing, seeing close friends etc.) are not worth doing. I can't squeeze any strength to do anything.

In short: in my condition I can't live for and by 'me', 'myself' and 'I'. I can't be in the center of my own life circle and how it affects on me is that I need outside reasons to go on. I have many times said to my close ones that my pets are the most important thing to me. It is true, without my pets I wouldn't see a reason to get up from the bed in the morning. On top of my pets, I do have two really important persons. Other one is my boyfriend and the other person's identity is going to remain a secret because it is not relevant. I do have friends who are super close ones, but it would be pain in the ass to trying to explain to you why I only count two persons to this essential class.

Reason why I thought I would write only in english today is because I have been writing about these things so much in finnish it feels kinda unfair to leave people out who don't know this crazy Scandinavian language.

I express great gratitude to those who have the heart to keep seeing me on social media even tho I keep long breaks sometimes.
It would be awesome if you would suggest some subjects I should do on my blog, instagram, twitter or/and tumblr.

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